Waddup ??!! Yeah my blog is really dusty ryte? Haha. I've been busy updating my tumblr more than my blog. Sorr for that bloggy but nowadays not many ppl using blog. Most ppl using tumblr now. I dunno why I feel like updating my blog. Maybe because its dusty and nobody even reads it. Even my tagboard is dead. Everything is except for my tumblr yeah. Life have a mixture of both good and bad. I love the company of ppl with me now. All the good ppl are beside me sticking with me thru thick and thin. Not forgetting my dearest boyfie, Cliford a.k.a Eping. His been with me thru my toughest time, he knows my weakness and my strength. He knows what Im capable of and what Im not capable of. So today....Im not in campus. I needed a break. I didnt even called Ms Julie and inform her. Smtg's tell me that Im gonna get wacked for that tmrw. But I'll figure out smtg. I saw the necklace the lady gave to me. It was pretty cool. It suits the color of earth. The color of trees, sand, rocks, everything about Gaia. Keeps me calm when I see that. Im charged but smtg tells me that I needed rest. I needed time. I need a break. A break from the realm. Just focus about reality and studies. Basic importants....when Im ready then I'll try. But now, Im still learning to walk on the right path, to control myself. To let the light in me, to believe Allah is always there. To believe the Universe will always be there for me. I've deleted most of my black metal songs. Those evil songs Invoking and Banishing songs. Yes there's a devil in all of us. But Im not letting that devil take control of me. Ramadhan is near. I only want the good light to be with me and guide me to go thru everything thru thick and thin. To be with the best people the ones I loved, my family, my brothers and sisters, my boyfriend. Sometimes Im tempted to do bad things but now smtg tells me that STOP. Change. If I never change, I will lose the people I once loved and cared abt. I dowan that to happen. Yes Im stubborn, its in my genes. But im trying to lessen my stubborness. I did went to the dark side but no more. Im in the light side now, I feel peace and calm. Maybe there's more htings in my family history that I have to dig out. I dunno why Im experiencing this but...yeah .. Hopefully, I be able to get some answers in why Im like this. Sometimes I behave like Im not myself. I guess I better start searching.
